"What advice did you give to your successor?"
"Pee sitting down whenever you can."
- Barbara Walters interviewing Vladimir Putin
"I'm even better than Harvard assholes because I don't like that I'm a Harvard asshole." - Zadie Smith
"Zadie Smith had the most worthless Social Network/Zuckerberg review in the NYRB. I didn't even finish it, probably because I'm a racist misogynist." - The Editors
"Twas not me, good sirs. Muddy Waters invented electricity." - Ben Franklin
"I will be alone forever. I will be free forever." - David Geffen
in his Hall of Jade
"With anyone else it just feels forced, and I'm too self-conscious to enjoy myself. Only oppressing the Chinese gives me pleasure." - Wen Jiabao
"I want to return to my great theme again, you know? The Death of the West."
"Somebody get this guy the fuck out of here."
-Robert Towne and Warren Beatty's last meeting, 1991
"Those quotes are so great, you really deserve to become famous for them in some limited way." - the Devil
"I didn't ask to be born." - Jeb Bush
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