- Bill Clinton
“Everyone gets to make love the way they want to!” – Santa Clinton
“Making it… is a way of life.” – Beat Clinton
“We make like hicks or the deal is off.” – Bill Clinton under the elms…
"How's your girl!? Haw haw haw!" - Clinton, getting into a limo, to Eliot Spitzer outside the Cotton Club
"Burned biscuits!" - Bill Clinton awaking from a gluten withdrawal dream
"Do you realize we live in a Golden Age for pornography?" - Bill Clinton interrupts Cory Booker at TEDTalks
"Why wait for Halloween?" - Bill Clinton on sexy costumes
"Ain't nothin a spoonful a hooch an' a dip in the mud won't rem'dy!"
- Doc Clinton to Lasik Eye Surgery victim Eric Cantor
"If there were a God in heaven, my love for you would be a sacrilege." -Bill Clinton, weirdly, to Donna Hanover
“I want to fuck you on a tandem bike.” – Old-time Clinton
“I’ll push up against anything soft enough.” – Bill Clinton
"Coquito ergo sum." - Clinton at the American Philosophical Association Eastern Division Conference, Tampa
"One by one, time plucks petals from the flower of youth." - Bill Clinton
"God is a feeling, and love is just a word." - Bill Clinton, liner notes for Black Saint and the Sinner Lady
"Somewhat chesty, thick but muscular, and with commanding lips...." - Bill Clinton trails off, TED talks, Shanghai 2020
"Love is only on the line if it's let in." - Clinton at the Rock n' Roll Hall of Game
"What do I drink at the club? A thimble of Everclear and a Miller 64." - Uptown Clinton
“Have you ever jerked it, like, you know, internally?” - Bill Clinton at the G20 Locker Room
"Well, I don't see what the problem is--"
"Doctor, I've had this erection for 48 hours!"
- Doc Clinton and designer drug victim Eric Cantor
"Live with me..."
- Tipper Gore slips out of Al Gore's desperate grip, Tacoma, WA
“I know what it’s like to be a lonesome and horny hick.” – Bill Clinton
"When did 'stupid' emerge as the modifier of choice to deride a penis? Did I have anything to do with it?" - James Carville
"What's big and wet and--"
- Vernon Jordan with Clinton
"Make love to the moment!" - Coach Clinton
"Nothing is forbidden to the imagination, nothing is foreign to desire." - Clinton bin Sabbah
"Damn, Bill, you're thin."
"People think I'm vegan, but it's the peyote."
- Clinton on his Vespa passing Al Gore at an In-N-Out Burger
"My story is one of digressions." - Bill Clinton