What Women Want

"I doubt that the same woman would go for both of us. Its a good sorting mechanism. Women like me because they have daddy issues--they're wowed by an outsized body and an outsized mind, both equally dubious."
"All women are driven to love by daddy issues."
"True enough, but you're more like a cool older brother you can fuck, the kind of pretty, skinny guy that every girl wanted to fuck when she was eighteen. In you they cling to what they remember of themselves at that age."
"That appeal is fading."
"True, you're getting older."
"So are they. Memories fade."
"I suggest you learn about gourmet cheeses. You need to add some sophistication to your whole 'I surf and hike' shit."
"Cheese, wine, hike, fuck!"
"Well, not in that order. You'll get gas."
"I think this is going on the blog."
"- Siskel and Ebert, 1973"
"We can do better with the attribution, I mean... No, actually, that's perfect."
"Do we leave in the part about us discussing the attribution?"
"Run with it. It might get us laid."
- Siskel and Ebert, 1973