Thursday, October 27, 2011

The Rick Parry Brigade


"It's never to late to join the bandwagon! Authenticity is counterrevolutionary!" - Willard Romney in queue for the McDonald's bathroom

"I get it, it's just like Twitter!" – Sarah Palin on the People's Mic

"Ribbit ribbit, pig." – Michael Steele at the barricades

"No one's gonna beat up emos when the Dept. of Youth is on the street!" - Rand Paul

"I got the highest score on the Civil Service exam, the answer to every question was the whip!" – NYPD Lt. Rick Santorum

"Roll the fucking dice!" - Michele Bachmann leading a snake march into Hell

"Hey Wall Street: Let's fuck!" – Ron Paul

"What kind of clothes should I wear to the Occupation?"
"Like, I dunno, a lot of yellows, some plaid, maybe a tutu and chaps, whatever the fuck you want, people are free here!"
- Mitch McConnell, Joe Lieberman

“I saw pizza everywhere, shared and unfinished!” – Herman Cain

"Be my Arab Spring." – New Gin Ginch to his fourth wife

"One day, Simba, all of this will be in rebellion against you." - Hank Paulson to Lloyd Blankfein, 2006

“I’m with the People now, uncle!”
“But then who will you lash?”
- George W. Bush, Dick Cheney

"What the fuck do you mean 'contingent upon capitalism?'"
"I said, this shit is contingent upon capitalism! All your shit is donated by people with jobs!"
"Fuck you. Everything is contingent upon capitalism. That's why they call it capitalism."
- John Boehner to a Maoist

"In conclusion, autonomist revolt is not only more desirable than social democracy but also, in the American context, easier to accomplish. Now, time for questions. Yes, you there."
"But, Mr. Huntsman, what about the state's monopoly on the legitimate use of violence?"
"Well, I'm glad you asked, you see--CHINESE GANGSTERS!"
- Jon Huntsman, gunned down at Occupy Phoenix

"People ask if I’m jealous of Herman, of his success in the polls, his new book deal. 'That coulda been you!,' they say. I say, naw, man, I’m just a regalur guy. I love Herman, power to whom, but I just don’t want what he wants. I’m not ambitious. I’m just trying to get by and sneak in a dance with Transcendence when I can, you know?" - Rick Parry, meditation circle

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