Tuesday, April 7, 2015

Bark Like a Blue Devil

"Duke wins! Nothing has to change ever!" - Broadcasting

"How many rapists get a pass tonight because of this?" - Rolling Stone, later retracted

So, when Wisconsin was dust, all cried, ‘To Cameron Indoor!
Run, Grayson, one race more! the meed is thy due!
Duke’s honor is saved, thank Pan, go shout!’ He flung down his ball
Ran like fire once more: and the space 'twixt the fennel-field
And Durham was stubble again, a field which a fire runs through,
Till in he broke: ‘Rejoice, we conquer!’ Like wine through clay,
Joy in his blood bursting his heart, - the bliss!
"This is not an art in you, whereby you speak well on Duke, but a divine power, which moves you like that in the stone which Euripides named a 'magnet,' but most people call 'Heraclea stone.'"
- the ghost of Stuart Scott and Keith Olbermann, Sports Center

"Of course I went to Duke." - Tim Cook to Nixon's ghost

"After the coup and the murder of Allende I returned to America, but I returned to teach at Chapel Hill, for in my time at the economics department at Duke I had seen the seeds of Pinochet." - Former Chilean President Richard Lagos

"And to think, money made all this possible. America is just a game? Oh no, it's a dream--of ivy and research-triangle office parks and the right people getting off every fucking time." - Coach K brings the Boy Men to weeping

"I can't wait to see my girl, Coach!"
"Girlfriend? You lie with eunuchs painted gold tonight, my son!"

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