Tuesday, May 5, 2015

Watch It, It's For You

HBO: Not just TV, expensive trash fantasy realism made safe for neo-liberal prestige consumption.

AMC: Adult drama without the unpleasantness of cursing or tits

Showtime: Let's be fucking extreme and novelly titillating (for one season)

Amazon: What do you want to watch? Mr. Bezos has no idea!

Netflix: We're a content producer now, but our dependence on the physical and intellectual property infrastructure of larger companies ensures nothing will ever really change.

PBS: Look at this shit that fell off a lorry, plus, yeah I think Ken Burns is coming over with his new 10-part doc Corn

CNN: Spectacle you can use

FOX: Mold at the speed of light

NHK: Missives from America’s near future as a graying debtor nation in love with cartoon animals

BBC America: Brits as they really are, that is, as they think Americans want them to be

RT: Those fellow travelers were wrong, but you are right.

ESPN: The Worldwide Leader in Chattel

Network TV: Like nutrition labels, specifically made for you, and equally preoccupied by lies.

Basic Cable: Reality shows mixed with vague memories of content or purpose.

Golf: Golf.

Weather: Predictable and serene, but online, fluids lurk.

Al Jazeera: Pure enough for Medina or the faculty lounge.

Bloomberg: The unprecedented number of news crawls crowding the screen is a metaphor for the treadmill you are currently on.

YouTube: You've never even heard of Nam June Paik.

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