AMC: Adult drama without the unpleasantness of cursing or tits
Showtime: Let's be fucking extreme and novelly titillating (for one season)
Amazon: What do you want to watch? Mr. Bezos has no idea!
Netflix: We're a content producer now, but our dependence on the physical and intellectual property infrastructure of larger companies ensures nothing will ever really change.
PBS: Look at this shit that fell off a lorry, plus, yeah I think Ken Burns is coming over with his new 10-part doc Corn
CNN: Spectacle you can use
FOX: Mold at the speed of light
NHK: Missives from America’s near future as a graying debtor nation in love with cartoon animals
BBC America: Brits as they really are, that is, as they think Americans want them to be
RT: Those fellow travelers were wrong, but you are right.
ESPN: The Worldwide Leader in Chattel
Network TV: Like nutrition labels, specifically made for you, and equally preoccupied by lies.
Basic Cable: Reality shows mixed with vague memories of content or purpose.
Golf: Golf.
Weather: Predictable and serene, but online, fluids lurk.
Al Jazeera: Pure enough for Medina or the faculty lounge.
Bloomberg: The unprecedented number of news crawls crowding the screen is a metaphor for the treadmill you are currently on.
YouTube: You've never even heard of Nam June Paik.
