"What lights on the horizon... New York City... Imperium Galactica... shimmering obelisk of our collective virility..." - Michele Bachmann, Acela Express
"Never goad the gaucho on a night of whiskey!" - Jon Huntsman, awoken from an afternoon nap, Dunlip, NH
"Supercollider, slip it inside her, big saucer eyes, knife in the wood, night in the wood..." - John Kyl freezing to death in Catalina State Park, AZ
"Do you side with Cuba, or with the renegade forces of Col. Octavio Montonyez?" - Herman Cain to frightened 23-year old GOP Super Delegate Mary Lee Davis
"I am exactly what I appear to be!" - Rick Parry, draped in lion pelt
"Truly you are the animal trainer who makes the mindless instinctual rage of the killer art in motion." - Jerry Brown to Linda Katehi
"Doctor, I'm done, I'm throwin' in the towel!""Jesus, my goddam skin itches, draw me another bath." - Mitch McConnell
"You're not dead yet, boy!"
"No, Doc, I don't want to live!"
"You ain't got a choice, boy!"
"No, Doc, no!"
"Yes, boy, yes! There's something worse than dyin', boy: you gotta keep livin'!"
- John Boehner performing surgery on a burn victim Eric Cantor
"Goddam crabs keep following me everywhere..." - Chuck Schumer
"We're the same, you and me..." - Mike Tyson to Karl Rove
"Don't listen to 'Volcano' or you'll never love again." - Orrin Hatch to Bill Paxton
"Pleasure is blackmail." - New Gingrinch
"Chem trails.... rockets in the night... am I in love... or is this just biopolitics?" - Herman Cain