"Listening to Watch the Throne makes me want to buy a bunch of shit I can't afford with credit cards." - Phil Collins
"Listen, Cube, we can do this. Black people will drink Coors Light!"
- Pete Coors to Ice Cube
"Look at my eyes, doctor! I'm sick! I'm Evil!" - Cee Lo Green
"I wrote four novels yesterday, fuuuuuckkkkk!" - Balzac
"I was into jazz but then someone told me that hard writing hard running motherfuckers live forever." - Haruki Murakami
"I love your dialogue, you've got a great ear for the way people actually talk."
"You've got great tits."
- Jonathan Franzen drunk at Book Club
They found Boehner on the Capitol dome with a bottle of Jack and a nine, muttering, "Murder murder murder she wrote...""I went into my bathroom after getting back the other day and found a massive spider sitting on my hand towel, it was striped, wicked, and arrogant. Though in my underwear I killed the bastard straight."
- Rick Parry
"...seduce a chambermaid, murder the duke, found a colony..."
- from the Emergency Diary of Ron Paul
"Success is illegitimate." - Warren Buffet
"I traded in my dick and all I got was this lousy MFA!" - your son
"Pretend it isn't demeaning."
- Marlon Brando on how to be a great actor
"I am the Roger Ebert of cinema." - Werner Herzog
"Just as every great nation has its founding crime, so every great man has his, usually the abandonment of his mother or enslavement of his wife." - Judd Apatow
"Violence against women is entertaining." - Eli Roth
"I didn't realize that women could do anything." - Zach Snyder
"Masculinity is passivity." - Elliot Gould