One Down, One Up

"I never got laid either!" - Beethoven

"Vienna is just a sugarshack, baby." - Liszt

"I didn't even write this, I just made love to my cousin and it burst forth from my forehead!" - Wagner

"Hoodlum lady, will you bless this reed with a kiss?"
"That shit don't swing!"
- Trouble at the Half-Note with Hank Mobley

"Artist, if you dare cross the Smooth then you go to a place where Jazz cannot save thee." - Creed Taylor

Stan Getz Denounces Brazil on Death Bed,
War Declared on Cool Jazz

"I am the Night!" - Chopin emerging from the flames of Warsaw

"I am the Sun!" - Coltrane jumping off a Chinatown roof with a Hi-Fi blasting Bach cantatas

"I'm disoriented and lost in a barn!"
"Alright! Now let's see you suffer in 4/7 time."
- Dave Brubeck and God in Job: An Ecclesiastical Happening

Smooth Bossa Nova Stylings of Tom Jobim Kill Twelve

"I haven't shit in twelve years!" - Arthur Schoenberg

"I can't stop shitting!" - Philip Glass

"This shit is a gondola ride on a river of opium and blonde hair."
- Johnny Hartman on Lush Life