"Prima Nocta!!!!" - Prince Charles
"Truly its inconsequential majesty will reverberate throughout the millenia." - The Archbishop of Canterbury"That dress should have been mine!" - Tony Blair
"I am the goose that laid the eggs that shall be poached on the breakfast of the nuptial feast!" - Sarah Ferguson
"I've dreamed of a future love that could be/ a dark maiden by the sea/ her love to a monkey that wore the red coat of the See." - Jimi Hendrix "Ukulele Future Jam 2"
"whoooo whooo whooo whooo whoooo!" - The Media
"The buffet was perhaps the most extravagant part. It was all vegan food and Irish children" - Camilla Parker Bowles
"My dick is a Chicken McNugget!" - Prince William
"I am a dragon! I am the knight that saved the maiden!" - Harry Wales engaging the wedding cake in a rugby scrum
"Before the gowning I spent 20 minutes with her. She wanted my birth certificate and 3 pints of blood." - Kate Middleton on HM
"Ugly as her name, that bit of rough." - Prince Philip on Princessa Beatrice
"We had to cut the Harrier jets. Prince Harry kept calling me and saying he'd need them to 'elope with my sweet Princess Qadaffi.'" - PM David Cameron
""Look at that ass! Is she from Queens?" - Sidney Lumet on Princess Beatrice
"When the people have broken the gates and despoiled my lands. When Philip lies dead on the ground a republican lance in his gullet, only then will I profess a belief in human love." - HM
